As February the fourteenth approaches every year, I see a lot of negativity all around me about Valentine's Day. I think it is sad that a day that is devoted to love has so much hate surrounding it. I always thought there was enough hate in the world and that a holiday about love really should be pretty acceptable no matter what your creed, color, or background. After much watching of friends and relatives over the years, I've heard several arguments against it and wanted to share my thoughts about each of them.
"If you knew the history of Valentine's Day, you wouldn't celebrate it"
Admittedly, This is the least often heard argument, but I thought it was still worth mentioning.
I celebrate Christmas and Easter. I give away candy on Halloween. I know the background- both good and not so good- on many of the people we have holidays for, and I still celebrate all of them. The history or origin of holidays are important to know, but how we celebrate them now should also be kept in mind before we condemn something. Know about the past, but don't live in it.
In my mind, Valentine's Day is actually much closer in relation to the history of the man it is named after than just about any other holiday celebrated in the United States that I can think of. It is still a celebration of love, and that's basically what St Valentine gave his life for in the first place.
"Valentine's Day is just for commercial businesses to make you buy things you don't otherwise need"
Every other holiday in the US has the exact same commercial side. You can find jewelry stores advertising for President's Day. Plates and cups for Martin Luther King Junior Day. Candy for every holiday imaginable, including ones I've not heard of. Everything is commercialized now and you can't avoid it.
The response to this is simple- don't buy into it. You can celebrate Valentine's without spending one extra penny. As a couple, Zach and I have done it before and will more than likely do it again. If you can avoid buying into it the other 364 days of the year, you most certainly do not have to give in to it on Valentine's day. Candy and flowers cost nowhere near as much as what most people spend on Christmas anyway.
Plus, you can get cheap chocolates and candies on February 15th. Just like November 1st. What's not to love about that?
"If you really love someone, shouldn't you show them all the time?"
Yes. Yes you should.
But if we're going to take that route, we really should not celebrate any holiday. We should be thankful all the time. We should remember and celebrate Jesus' birth, death and resurrection daily. We know the country we live in and its history. We certainly know we were born. We should always love and respect, and appreciate our parents. And yet we celebrate, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, The Fourth of July, our own personal birthdays, and Mother's and Father's Day.
Celebrating a holiday doesn't mean what we're celebrating is only important for one day. It simply means that it's important enough to us to have a day dedicated to it. And I think that a single day out of the year to celebrate love is wonderful. Especially since now it's not really just for couples... We'll get to that in a second...
"I'm single so the holiday means nothing to me"
I really think this might be one of the silliest arguments simply because of the flexibility of relationships. Most people are not single their entire lives, so should we bring the holiday back when you find a mate? What if you break up? There will always be single people, and there will always be couples.
But I think Valentine's goes far beyond that now. Children hand out valentines to their classmates. Some of them spend hours hand making each and every one. I do not think they intend to marry, or become romantically involved, with every child around them, but they still wish to let others know that they care about and think of them.
We had a party at Awana last night and some of the kids went out of their way to find and give me the valentines they had. When I got home, I looked at them all, gathered them to my heart and thanked God for the wonderful gift these children were. That they thought enough of their teachers to find them even after the 'main event' was over and give them a silly piece of paper just so we knew they did care made me feel far more special than I probably should have.
If you're completely hung up on the coupleness aspect and simply cannot stay home alone and pout about not 'being' one, find a friend or two and go out together. Single friends, nieces, nephews, sons, daughters, parents (people who are 'coupled' but alone for whatever reason would work too, I suppose. Just don't take the mopey one who will bring you down further) There WILL be people with no plans for the day if you look hard enough... The things you can do on Valentine's are pretty much endless. My favorite is to go to a mall and watch all the couples that suddenly seem to have sprung up. People who are set up because they couldn't imagine Valentine's alone. People who have been together for fifty years and decided to go out just because they feel obligated, and couples who would do this on any other day, but this is just a little extra special because of the holiday. People watching is great any day. On Valentine's, it's a whole new world.
So please, even if you can't stand the holiday, don't complain about it. What point is there to being depressingly negative about something that really won't go away no matter what you do anyway? And do we really want to cover the true spirit behind the day more than all the lace doilies in the supermarket already have?
I'm free tomorrow if you're lonely. We can go to Tyson's Corner together and giggle.
God bless and see you soon,
Joelle
